Probably the biggest highlight of our year was the anticipation of our baby girl, Cora Joy, due March 4, 2015. That anticipation quickly turned to fear when we discovered she was very sick on February 3rd. She was delivered via emergency C-section on February 4th, four weeks early. Her official diagnosis was fetal hydrops, a condition in which a baby takes on an excess of fluid. She weighed 10 pounds 6 ounces at birth. I also gained an excess of fluid (about 16 pounds worth in a day), which was the only real sign that anything was wrong. Doctors called it mirror syndrome, since I was mirroring what happened to Cora. Her delivery was extremely terrifying due to the unknown circumstances surrounding fetal hydrops. It can be caused by many different things, but 30% of the time the cause is never discovered. We fall into that 30%. At this point, doctors do not expect we will ever learn the cause. Cora's chest was so overwhelmed by fluid, drain tubes were inserted into both sides to relieve the pressure. She was unable to breathe because the pressure was so great, it was like breathing against concrete. She was immediately placed on an oscillating ventilator. She was also placed on countless medicines to help her body heal and overcome the edema (swelling). A week after delivery, her bowels spontaneously perforated. She needed surgery to have another drain tube inserted into her abdomen to release the bile filling up inside. A week later, the bowel perforated again, requiring major abdominal surgery to find the source of the leak. Surgeons discovered two small holes in her small intestine, removed the failed section of the bowel, and completed the ostomy. Another surgery will be scheduled 6 weeks from this surgery to reconnect the section of her intestine.
Anyone who knows me, or has read my previous blogs knows that I have endured many heartaches over the last 4 1/2 years. I wouldn't wish my life experiences on anyone. However, watching my baby girl suffer this last month, is by far, the most awful thing I've experienced. On several occasions, we truly expected to say our goodbyes. Instead of thinking about "when" we brought her home, my mind was consumed with "if" we brought her home. She was so sick those first few weeks, I doubt the doctors expected her to survive. Her condition was very rare, and complicated by the unknown causes of it.
Shortly after learning Cora was sick, Brent and I began asking friends and family to pray. We really didn't understand how severe her situation was, but we knew we needed as many people as possible to lift our precious baby up to the Lord in prayer. We later learned that at delivery, 18 minutes passed before doctors could resuscitate her. The fact that she survived birth was a miracle. God answered those prayers. We later learned that it was unlikely for her to survive the first 24 hours. Not only did she survive the first day, but she began showing improvements in those first few days. God answered our prayers by providing another miracle. When her bowels perforated the first time, her doctor gave us the news with tears in her eyes. She didn't sound hopeful for a positive outcome. We begged our friends and family to pray fervently for God to work another miracle in her life. Once again, God answered those prayers. A week later the same thing. We prayed for the surgeons to find the perforation, so Cora could continue getting stronger. God answered those prayers again. We continue asking God to heal our baby girl, and He continues to answer. Cora Joy is our beautiful little miracle. In her 32 days of life, I have witnessed God working a modern day miracle right before my eyes.
In those early days of Cora's life, I relied heavily on the promises of God. My heart was so broken, my mind so overwhelmed, that it hurt to breathe. I felt as if the life was being sucked right out of me. The only comfort I could find was in God's Word. During some of the more critical moments, Brent and I would read our favorite psalms aloud to each other. Our desperation turned to peace as we felt His promises wash over us.
One particular psalm struck a chord in my heart as I clung to the words. In my Bible, the theme for Psalm 77 says: "We are comforted through the hard times by remembering God's help in the past. Recalling God's miracles and previous works can give us courage to continue." Verses 11-14 say, "I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. I will meditate on all your works and consider all your mighty deeds. Your ways, O God, are holy. What god is so great as our God? You are the God who performs miracles; You display your power among the peoples." God had worked several times in my life by bringing me through very difficult losses. Losing a loved one is hard. Losing a husband, mother, and best friend in four years, seems impossible. Yet, God gave me the strength, comfort and peace to walk through each of those journeys. My heart couldn't say goodbye again. I couldn't bear the thought of my mother, who is in heaven, holding my baby girl before me. I found my peace knowing, just as He had every time in the past, God would bring me through whatever lay ahead. I could place my trust in Him, having every confidence that He would perform a miracle in my life. I didn't know if that miracle would be the heavenly or earthly healing of our baby girl. Either way, I knew He would heal her.
Cora Joy continues to improve. Two weeks has passed since her ostomy surgery. She no longer has chest tubes or the abdominal tube. She is breathing on her own. I held her for the first time when she was three weeks old. She is such a beautiful baby! She is no longer sedated, and off all antibiotics. She only receives nutrients as she continues to increase her feedings. Over the last few days, she has learned to take her bottle, rarely needing the support of her feeding tube. She currently weighs 7 pounds 9 ounces. She continually amazes her doctors with her incredible progress. God has given her a fighting spirit that doesn't give up. Her testimony will be amazing. We still have several weeks before she is fully healed, but we look forward to "when" she gets to come home. We continue to praise God for the incredible work He has done in our family through our little Joybug's life. Cora Joy is our little miracle!
